A person who fears judgment eventually lives according to strangers.

Fear of judgment hands the shape of your life to people who are not paying attention. You adjust for imagined reactions from acquaintances, colleagues, and near-strangers whose opinions will never be spoken and would not matter if they were. Over time these unvoiced verdicts become the actual rules you live by.

When you feel the pull of what people will think, ask specifically which people. Then ask whether those particular individuals have earned that authority. Usually the jury turns out to be vague, and once it has been named it loses much of its force. Keep the handful whose judgment you genuinely respect and dismiss the rest.