Integrity is doing what you respect, not merely avoiding what others might condemn.

There are two different standards available, and they produce different lives. One asks what you could get away with; the other asks what you would respect. The first is set by other people’s ability to detect you, which means your behaviour is really being managed by their attention rather than your judgment.

Before something borderline, ask whether you would respect this if you saw someone else do it. That question bypasses the whole calculation about who might find out. It also tends to produce a clearer answer than any amount of reasoning about rules and consequences.