Every man deems that he has precisely the trials and temptations which are the hardest of all for him to bear; but they are so, because they are the very ones he needs.

Your own difficulty always feels like the hardest one because it presses exactly where you are least practised. Someone else’s trouble looks manageable from outside, and they think the same about yours. That does not mean any of it is deserved or arranged for your benefit; it means the shape of what you struggle with tells you something true about where you are thin.

Rather than comparing loads, look at what your current one is asking of you: patience, perhaps, or asking for help, or tolerating not knowing. Practise that one thing this week in a small, low-stakes place, where the cost of failing is nothing.