The second you let someone push your buttons, you’ve handed them the remote to your whole day.

A reaction that is automatic is a reaction someone else can trigger on purpose. Once a person knows the sentence that gets you, they can adjust your mood whenever it suits them, and they barely have to try. The annoying part is that being right about the provocation does not help. Your afternoon is still theirs.

Work out which two or three things reliably set you off and name them to yourself. When one shows up, put a gap between the trigger and your response, even ten seconds. The gap is the whole skill, because in that space the choice comes back to you.