Some homes are inherited; others are deliberately constructed from everything you wished had been different.

Some people receive a home and some have to build one from a specification written by what was missing. The second kind is made deliberately, out of decisions about how people will be spoken to, what will be allowed, what will never be repeated. It takes more effort and it is entirely yours.

If you are building rather than inheriting, be explicit about the terms. Name what you are refusing to carry forward. Deliberate homes need their principles said out loud to survive difficult days.