The goal is being the same person on the screen and at the kitchen table.

Keeping two versions of yourself running is quietly expensive. Every gap between the public one and the private one has to be maintained, remembered, and defended, and the effort goes on in the background whether or not anyone is close to finding out. Consistency is less about virtue than about no longer paying that bill.

Look for the place where the two versions differ most. Not to confess anything, just to see it. Then close the gap from whichever end is easier, either by being a little more honest in public or by living privately the way you claim to.