The friend who remembers small details is often listening when nothing dramatic is happening.

Remembering a small detail is not a talent for names and dates. It means that when you mentioned it, in the middle of a dull conversation about nothing, somebody was actually there. That is the whole signal. Attention during unremarkable moments is much rarer than sympathy during a crisis, and it is a better indicator of how someone regards you.

Notice who does this for you and value it accordingly. Then try it deliberately, following up on something minor a week later. It communicates more than a large gesture and it costs almost nothing.