“You’ve changed” can sting. Sometimes it’s an accusation. Sometimes it’s just someone noticing you grew.

Those two words arrive with no verdict attached, which is why they land so hard. You supply the verdict yourself, usually the worst available one. Sometimes it really is a complaint about having become harder to predict. Sometimes it is an accurate observation from somebody who noticed you are not fifteen anymore.

When you hear it, ask what they noticed, plainly and without heat. Then decide for yourself whether the change is one you would defend. Growing out of a version of yourself will inconvenience somebody, and that on its own does not make it wrong.