Being someone’s first choice feels different when they only choose during emergencies.

Usefulness is easily mistaken for closeness, and there is a particular loneliness inside that mistake. You are the one they call when things collapse, and the calls stop the moment the crisis does. The role is real and the affection may be too; what is missing is the ordinary time that makes a friendship mutual rather than functional.

Look at who contacts you only when something is wrong. If it matters to you, ask for something ordinary with them, a walk or a meal with nothing to solve. Their answer will tell you a lot without any confrontation.