Let children keep a few harmless preferences that differ from the family’s favorites.

Families develop a shared taste and then treat it as a fact about the household. The child who does not like the traditional dish, the annual outing or the sport everyone watches gets gently teased back into line, and the message underneath is that belonging requires agreement. It is rarely meant that way. But a child learns quickly which preferences are safe to have out loud.

When a child’s taste differs and nothing important is at stake, let it stand without commentary. Cook the other thing occasionally. Someone who was allowed small disagreements at home finds the larger ones easier to raise later.