An old friendship should make it easier to be yourself, not harder to admit you have changed.

Long friendships hold a complete record of who you were, which is usually a comfort and occasionally a cage. The old roles are still there, along with the opinions you have quietly abandoned and the jokes about what you are like. Saying that something has changed can feel like a betrayal of the shared history. So people perform an outdated version of themselves in the company that knows them best.

Tell one old friend something current: a view that has shifted, a thing you no longer find funny, a plan you would once have mocked. Most friendships absorb this easily and become more comfortable afterwards.